“You Know When You Just Don’t Feel Like Yourself Anymore?” — How Therapy Can Help During Perimenopause and Menopause

There’s a moment that many women can’t quite name—but they feel it.

You’re not depressed exactly. Not anxious in the usual way. But something’s… off.

You’re suddenly overstimulated by things that never used to bother you. Noise. Clutter. People needing things from you. You’re snappier. Tired but wired. The routines that used to ground you aren’t working. You miss who you used to be—your energy, your focus, your ability to let things roll off your back.

If this sounds familiar, you might be in perimenopause or menopause—even if your doctor hasn’t mentioned it yet.

What Does It Mean to “Not Feel Like Yourself”?

For many women, perimenopause doesn’t show up with flashing lights or a clear diagnosis. Instead, it shows up in quiet, disorienting ways:

   •   You lose your words mid-sentence

   •   You feel more irritable or overwhelmed

   •   Sleep gets disrupted—for no clear reason

   •   You feel low, flat, or easily emotional

   •   You doubt your decisions more than usual

   •   Anxiety creeps in where it never used to live

   •   You cry at commercials (or nothing at all)

You might wonder, “Is it stress? Am I just burnt out? Is this depression?”

Sometimes it’s all of those things layered on top of shifting hormones that alter your nervous system, your mood regulation, and even your sense of identity.

This season is a major life transition—one that impacts not just your body, but your emotions, roles, relationships, and sense of self.

Therapy Can Help You Reconnect to Yourself

Even though perimenopause and menopause are physical processes, they affect your mental and emotional world deeply. And this is where therapy can be transformative.

In therapy, we can:

   •   Name what’s happening (because having language helps)

   •   Reframe symptoms as meaningful signals, not weaknesses

   •   Explore grief, identity shifts, and life transitions that often come with this stage

   •   Learn strategies to regulate your nervous system, manage emotional waves, and reduce reactivity

   •   Build new routines that actually fit who you are now, not who you used to be

Questions You Might Be Asking Right Now:

   •   Why am I so sensitive lately?

   •   Is this the new normal?

   •   Am I broken?

   •   How can I get my energy and motivation back?

   •   Why does everything feel harder than it should?

   •   How do I explain this to people in my life when I don’t even understand it myself?

You’re not alone—and these questions deserve space and care, not quick fixes or dismissive advice like “it’s just hormones.”

What Kind of Therapy Can Help?

A variety of therapeutic approaches can support women in this stage of life, including:

   •   EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing): Ideal for addressing emotional overwhelm, trauma responses, or old self-beliefs that get triggered more easily during hormonal shifts.

   •   ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy): Helps you hold space for difficult emotions, make room for uncertainty, and take action aligned with your values—even when things feel messy.

   •   Mindfulness-based therapies: Can calm a racing mind and reconnect you with the present moment, especially when your internal world feels loud or fragmented.

   •   Talk therapy with a relational or integrative lens: Gives you a place to be heard, understood, and witnessed without needing to explain or perform.

The goal isn’t to “fix” you—but to help you come back home to yourself during this transition and beyond.

What You Can Do Right Now

If you’re feeling out of sync or overwhelmed, here are a few things you can try today:

   •   Track your symptoms. Start noting changes in mood, sleep, focus, or energy. Patterns often reveal what your body’s trying to tell you.

   •   Simplify your routines. Even small adjustments—like fewer commitments or more quiet time—can support a nervous system in transition.

   •   Practice nervous system regulation. Try deep belly breathing, grounding techniques, or 30 seconds of cold water on your face or neck.

   •   Limit comparison. This season may look different than others, and that’s okay. Focus on what your body and mind need now—not what used to work.

   •   Say it out loud. Whether to a friend, partner, journal, or therapist—naming what you’re going through can reduce shame and create relief.

If you’re ready to go deeper, therapy can give you a safe place to untangle what’s coming up and reconnect with yourself.

It’s Okay to Say: “This Is Hard.”

You don’t have to power through this alone. Therapy offers a space to unpack the mental load, process the emotional noise, and learn to listen to your body and intuition again.

This season of life isn’t about going back to who you were. It’s about becoming someone even more self-aware, self-compassionate, and free.

If you’re noticing these shifts and feel like therapy might help, trust that instinct. You don’t need a diagnosis or a crisis to deserve support—sometimes, simply not feeling like yourself is reason enough.

Ready to start feeling like yourself again? Contact me today to schedule your first session.